Marrying Ross Poldark: Demelza's Daring Gamble In the Shadow Of Elizabeth

 'If Ross had not wished to marry her she would not have fretted for something else: but his decision to make the union legal and permanent, his honouring her with his name, was a sort of golden crown to set upon her happiness.'

'Ross Poldark' Internal book 3 Chapter 1 part 2

On reflection, while Ross's proposal of marriage was an offer which it would have seemed was too good for Demelza to turn down, because of what could be referred to as Ross's 'baggage', it could have been considered a 'risky decision'. Demelza had agreed to marry a man that not only was well above her station but who as the readers were at that point led to believe, was in love with another woman. That woman had her stall set up by Winston Graham as the dream woman of the county. Indeed Elizabeth was written as a most beautiful woman who was Ross's unrequited first love and was also a gentlewoman. In being so Elizabeth was demure and patrician and of Ross's own class. As the excerpt heading this essay expresses, Demelza in her happy go lucky manner of floating through life moved through it with an admirable optimism which meant that while she relished and was illuminated by the opportunity to be Ross's wife, she did not desperately depend on this either. However, in Demelza's naivety she perhaps did not consider marriage to Ross Poldark as a 'daring' gamble or consider the long term implications and challenge that might form a cloud or tension over the marriage indefinitely. This is by virtue of it being a marriage in the shadow of Elizabeth. 

With Elizabeth being the woman Ross had intended to marry originally, accepting Ross's proposal of marriage was potentially Demelza stepping forward to fill Elizabeth's shoes. That would be in respect of the ideal Elizabeth presented and thus Demelza would be the alternative and the replacement at the same time. Putting Demelza's seemingly lowly credentials against Elizabeth's seemingly superior credentials, many, particularly of that time period would likely argue that Demelza was bound to be a woefully poor replacement for Elizabeth and that in time Ross would come to see this and perhaps resent Demelza for this. Then thoughts could be turned to why Demelza did not just stay in her place by marrying a miner or a fellow commoner, and why she instead took on the gamble of marrying Ross when she might always be in Elizabeth's shadow. This post explores the nature of the risk that Demelza took on and why the circumstances were such that she slipped in to this either obliviously or dismissive of it. 

The Risk Of Being The 'Placeholder' Wife

Elizabeth: An Obvious Potential Destructive Marital Issue?

As alluded to, the nature of the risk Demelza was taking on included that Ross's past with Elizabeth meant she could fall short when competing with or being measured up against Elizabeth as the ideal. So the risk was in Demelza proving herself to be a fair comparison to Elizabeth and not having Ross feeling short changed if she failed this. In doing so it should be appreciated that at Demelza's cost and pertaining to Ross’s simmering residual feelings for Elizabeth, she did not avoid experiencing upsets and insecurity in her marriage to Ross. That was because, whether known or unbeknown to Demelza in the first instance, Ross still believed he was in love with Elizabeth and it was his behaviour towards Elizabeth at times which stirred an insecurity in Demelza. On the face of it, since they knew this, many readers or adaptation viewers might still have felt like Demelza should have been aware of the extent of Ross's feeling for Elizabeth and that furthermore if she married him she should have expected that this burning flame for Elizabeth would be a destructive issue within her marriage to Ross. This was to the extent that the impact could have been that Demelza was at risk of ending up being like a 'placeholder' wife for Ross. Essentially this is being a temporary wife in name and nature until an opportunity came to reconnect romantically with Elizabeth.

Provocateur: At Risk Of The Liberated Needy Widow

'It was the first time he realised what Francis's death meant to her, to them both (Ross and Demelza), in terms of their own relationship.'

Dwight has a sense of the impact of Francis's death on Demelza and also Ross in respect of their marriage 'Warleggan' Internal Book 2 Chapter 2

No longer happy in her marriage to Francis, Elizabeth Poldark flirted
with Ross in the kitchen as she wore a startling red dress for pleasure 

If Demelza did indeed end up being a 'placeholder' wife to help Ross to have some female wifely company and children while he still dwelt over Elizabeth, then this could have meant that Demelza might be a wife destined to be cheated on by Ross with Elizabeth at some point. This could have been either in thought or in deed. However, as there was risk in this, there was also risk should there still have been interest in Ross on Elizabeth's side, and then if Elizabeth sought to lead Ross into thought or physical infidelity. If Demelza knew Ross to still be in love with Elizabeth or that Elizabeth would be in her subtle way the provocateur to Ross that she was eventually shown to be, Demelza could have forecast the risk of Elizabeth being a third person or shadow in the marriage. That includes being the woman who might command Ross's greater interest, desire, love and ascendancy of him. This would then result in Ross prioritising Elizabeth over his own wife. 

After Francis's untimely death Ross becomes an emotional and practical support for 
Elizabeth and see her more often than he did before when Francis was alive.

As a ‘placeholder wife’ the risk of defection in some form by Ross to Elizabeth could then have been heightened in a scenario such as an untenable breakdown of Francis and Elizabeth's marriage. Or the unforeseen and premature death of Francis. This is just as both did actually happen in the story. For instance, Elizabeth's marriage problems opened Elizabeth up to flirt with Ross in 'Jeremy Poldark' and to very likely to give a false impression she loved Ross while Francis was across the room in 'Warleggan'. Also, even though Ross's physical unfaithfulness with Elizabeth was not romantic and left Elizabeth feeling that Ross had treated her violently and dishonourably, Francis's death was a device which helped create a scenario where Ross was provoked into this rough behaviour of sexual assault. Before then Elizabeth's widowhood gave her and Ross the opportunity to engage more closely with each other and retie the strings of their attachment in their regular meetings. Prior to this, Francis being alive as Ross's cousin and Elizabeth's husband had provided a barrier to this and certainly to sexual contact between them (whether violent or romantic). 

The Risk Of Renewed invisible strings

'They had never before met like this, each week, confidentially , as friends. Each week tied the invisible strings.' 

Narration on Ross's visits to Elizabeth who was then a widow 'Warleggan' Internal Book 2 Chapter 3

Ross is sad to hear of Elizabeth's financial struggles as a widow and
therefore sees his banker to explore how he could help her.

Of course these possible scenarios which essentially served to make Elizabeth more available to Ross and for him to become more emotionally invested or proactive in supporting her as a widow, are unfortunate and dismal speculations to forecast. Though, that being said. they were not incredible and impossible. This is especially as Elizabeth had married into Ross's family and was a beneficiary and a resident of his ancestral home. These were things that would link them together indefinitely and ensure that there were opportunities over the years for Ross to be close with Elizabeth. So that would be based on circumstance alongside Ross's ongoing affection for Elizabeth fuelled by his idealism of her. Had Demelza thought in that way ahead of time, she could then have decided not to marry Ross. Or otherwise Demelza could have been hesitant and more prepared and accepting of ongoing entanglements with Elizabeth and Ross of some form. There was certainly that risk. This especially as Demelza perceived interest in Ross from Elizabeth. However, on finer consideration of the text as Winston Graham wrote it, and as will be explored in another post, it is not a certainty that Demelza knew without doubt that Ross was still in love (or what he thought was love) with Elizabeth when he married her. It is not even a certainty that she thought this for sure afterwards. Whatever the case, Demelza at seventeen years old seemed to have a much more simplistic and optimistic view of life which in the end was probably a blessing to support her innate free spiritedness when first coming into the marriage, and then while Ross fell in love with her shortly afterwards. 

A Daring Theft Of Ross As Elizabeth's Property?

"Elizabeth had Ross fast even though she married Francis. Then I came along and took him from her."

Demelza's thoughts on Elizabeth 'Jeremy Poldark' Internal Book 2 Chapter 4

After seeing Elizabeth at a party Ross is no longer interested in 
dancing with Ruth Teague as he was before.

A thought by Demelza in 'Jeremy Poldark' where she told herself "I came along and took him from her.", blatantly introduces the idea that Demelza should have expected to get her hands burned by marrying a man that apparently belonged to another woman and that she herself identified to be Elizabeth. From that idea might then have come one that Ross's unfaithfulness with Elizabeth was bound to happen too. Thus Demelza was risking a broken heart some time in the future. But actually, the scenario and nature of Ross's unfaithfulness with Elizabeth in its violent context, was not something many would think was bound to happen. Was was unfaithful but in a twist it was not romantic and this is as a reflection of Winston Graham's anti romantic profiling of them. Nevertheless in terms of the issue of Elizabeth belonging to Ross, as covered in 'Ross Poldark: Moving on From Elizabeth', readers could have picked up that much earlier, after Ross's return to Cornwall from war, he struggled with getting over Elizabeth.  The early stages of his mentality change and his attempt to move on included Ross flirting a little with Ruth Teague before changing his mind about pursing her when he was upset to see a newly married Elizabeth and Francis at the same party. Then him instead sleeping with a prostitute that night due to an urge to try to degrade the idea of love and sicken himself of it. While in that phase one could argue no other woman could satisfy and hold his interest, that was not the case three years later when Demelza finally did.

It occurs to Elizabeth that there is something between
 Ross and Demelza and she is 'too late' to reclaim him. 

As will be explored in an upcoming post called 'What Demelza Thought: Did Ross Still Love Elizabeth?' Demelza had had this momentary thought of her having taken Ross off Elizabeth years after she had married Ross in the third book. Her thinking was based on observations she had made by then over the years. They had influenced this thinking. For instance, observations such as Elizabeth being able to command Ross's attention in a more unsettling way than previously when Ross appeared more devoted to Demelza. Of course Demelza noticed Elizabeth's increasing success with Ross during their year of stress in that 'Jeremy  Poldark' era of their marriage. Ross and Demelza were slightly estranged following a tumultuous time and loss of their first child. Clearly when Elizabeth had come to see Ross at Nampara all those years before and just after Ross had slept with Demelza, Demelza had thought then that Elizabeth was 'one day too late'. Demelza had known then, and she was indeed right to think at that time that Elizabeth was after Ross and perhaps seeking to reclaim him then. However, Demelza did not know Ross's mindset then. She did not know if Ross felt like Elizabeth still had a hold over his heart. In fact readers should have picked up that it was not quite the case that he felt this way. Ross had proved this by how his meeting ended with Elizabeth when she visited him at Nampara and the choice he made to marry Demelza two days later. If there was any woman who he was to belong to, then Ross offering this to Demelza. And this is while Ross was essentially untying the invisible strings to Elizabeth. And this is deeply significant.

Ross Chose Demelza Over Elizabeth

'Those few bad moments when Elizabeth called were almost forgotten and altogether discarded.'

Demelza reflecting back on 'Ross Poldark' Internal Book 3 Chapter 1 Part 2

Indeed when it comes to risk assessment for Demelza, in many ways it was better that Ross asked Demelza to marry him within days of just seeing Elizabeth so that it was not so rash a decision with the two day cooling and reflection period. Better this than for Ross to have proposed, married Demelza and then realised when he next saw Elizabeth that the feelings she stirred in were such that had he seen her before the proposal to Demelza, that he would not have made it after all due to feeling he was not ready to move on. Indeed the most positive indicator around the risk in marrying Ross was that Ross effectively chose Demelza over Elizabeth during the Bluebell scene when he had thought of them as 'Two women.' Then he considered that they were 'Made of the same substance? Earthenware and porcelain.' Yet this was after he had done the unusual of introducing Demelza, his then servant to Elizabeth, a woman of the gentry. So it was as if they were equals despite their difference in station. Since Ross once thought years before that the gossip about him and Demelza being in a sexual relationship  was out of the question, his major shift in attitude about Demelza was indicative of the change in mentality that made the proposal even possible.

'.....he was interested in the idea of the two women meeting and becoming friends. He wanted Elizabeth to see that he had been content with no common substitute, either from his own class or another. He believed that she would be genuinely pleased to see him over his infatuation for her at last and happily settled. '
Ross thoughts when taking Demelza as his wife to Trenwith for the first time 'Ross Poldark'  (First edition) Internal Book 3 Chapter 7

Ross not only claimed Demelza as his wife he demonstrated that
he was not ashamed to show her of even to Elizabeth.

As Winston Graham wrote, Elizabeth had hoped for some reconciliation with Ross on her visit to Nampara and she no longer thought possible when she saw there was something romantic between Demelza and Ross. Ross was aware that there could have been such a reconciliation but he seemed to stay true to his self declaration made the night before and part of his moving on journey that 'He owed no one anything; certainly not Elizabeth...'  He instead chose not to pursue a reconciliation with Elizabeth. Demelza's confidence should have been bolstered Ross letting Elizabeth go and him not interacting with Elizabeth in a romantic way but just being friendly, civil and quite proper with her instead. Where Ross decided to accept Demelza's claim on him, (perhaps in her mind as a mistress) when she sat at his feet after Elizabeth had left, Ross in turn staked his claim on Demelza by way of proposing a marital bond two days later. Therefore, even though Ross was not in love with Demelza at this point he was showing that he was in the business of seeking something serious beyond her being his mistress. Instead he was willing to make a massive commitment to a permanent union. Marriage in those days was taken more seriously in the sense of it being genuinely considered a permanent bond. As set out in 'The Myth Of An Impossible Or Impractical Separation', divorce was practically impossible. This therefore was a sign for Demelza to build a reliance and faith in Ross and their union based on the extent of his commitment. Ross later wanting to show Demelza off as his new wife at Trenwith, considering his was over his infatuation of Elizabeth was over, that he was happy and settled and that he thought Elizabeth would see Demelza was not a poor substitute for her shows Ross was giving out the right signals that pointed to the idea that he had romantically disconnected from Elizabeth and was low risk. He was not disappointed with Demelza and Demelza putting her first clash with Elizabeth, a bad moment, behind her, suggests that she took some confidence from Ross and what they were building.

Elizabeth's Lost Property?

After 3 years Elizabeth leaves without her desired reconciliation
with Ross when she realises there's something between him and Demelza.

Indeed, even if one could say that Elizabeth choosing and marrying another man over Ross and therefore being unavailable to him meant that Ross could not belong to her and she did not have him in order to be 'taken' from him, for the taking, this was not the case by the time Ross slept with Demelza. It is true that later on Ross had led Elizabeth to believe he was still hers when six months after her wedding in the first edition text he implied that he could be prepared to come between her and Francis because his love for her created that danger. But even Elizabeth saw for herself when she turned up at Nampara the day after Ross had slept with Demelza that he did not quite belong to her as he did before, that she was 'too late' and the something between him and Demelza got in the way of her claiming Ross. As stated above Winston Graham wrote in the first edition text that Ross had already decided the night before that he owed nothing to Elizabeth, that she meant nothing to him and he should stop living a celibate life and experience loving elsewhere. So Elizabeth did not then have Ross for the taking as Demelza humbly thought. Ross did not grab with both hands the romantic reconciliation that Elizabeth was offering. He let her leave, choosing to marry Demelza instead. 

Taking Buyers! Ross As Hot Property Despite Elizabeth Romance

"....It's something to do with some jealous rivalry. Elizabeth Chynoweth was promised to Ross Poldark and instead married his cousin Francis. So years later Francis was killed in a mining accident and Ross wanted to throw over his kitchen maid, whom he'd married in the meantime and take Elizabeth. But Elizabeth would have none of it and married George Warleggan..."

Reverend Whitworth to Morwenna 'The Four Swans' Internal Book ! Chapter 2 Pt3

Despite gossip about Ross having wanted Elizabeth for himself Ruth
Teague still pursued Ross after Elizabeth married someone else and 
Ross was single.

Of course with Ross having mentally freed himself from Elizabeth or the idea of being with her, this makes Demelza's decision to marrying him less daring and risky. It also does not support any suggestion that Demelza was incredibly foolish to accept Ross's marriage proposal. After all this is not so when Ruth Teague with her mother's support was pursuing an offer of marriage from Ross herself. Her mother, Mrs Teague was a raging gossip and just like Reverend Whitworth did from his explanation excerpted above and said to Morwenna in 'The Four swans', the Teagues would have known about Ross's romantic history with Elizabeth too. This was probably in the most exaggerated and sensational terms. This is just as The Reverend described Ross's reaction to Francis's death in respect of Ross then wanting to take Elizabeth back and to dump his Demelza instead. Ultimately highly dramatised gossip might have given the  impression Ross was deeply attached and broody over not having Elizabeth. So if it was reasonable for Ruth in that knowledge to still pursue Ross, then it could hardly have been the reverse for Demelza who even had a stronger knowledge and connection with Ross. Despite his romantic 'baggage' Ross was still a catch to be caught in a period of time where marriages were a coup for a girl from the impoverished gentry, let alone a miner's daughter that was Ross's maid.

Elizabeth Missing In Action: A Distant Vistor -A Distant Threat

"I was seldom over (To Nampara) even when I was married to Francis."
Elizabeth to George in 'The Four Swans'

Demelza walks in on Elizabeth as a rare visitor to Nampara. 

While some may consider Demelza’s marriage decision high risk, Winston Graham certainly laid down a narrative which could make a reader perspective that Ross was actually a low risk husband, a palatable one. For instance, apart from Ross being a single man and newly sexually interested in Demelza after their night together, over the three years that she had been his maid, Elizabeth was not even a figure that had had any presence at Nampara and was not one who seemed to feature in Ross's life in a way that Demelza could see. In Ross's conversation with Elizabeth when she did visit him she admitted that she had not visited him more often as she did not think she had the right to. She also told George in 'The Four Swans' "I was seldom over even when I was married to Francis."  So as Demelza saw her in Ross’s parlour the morning after she first slept with Ross, the impression given that this was her first time seeing Elizabeth there, is probably correct. Elizabeth as an absent figure at Nampara would be a favourable consideration in Demelza's 'risky decision'. Of course it would be a negative consideration and concern if she was a frequent visitor. The worry would be if this continued after he had married Demelza. It would not be expected that having not visited much before that she would start visiting regularly once he was married.

Fresh Start: A Promising 'Fair Desire' in Demelza

'....Demelza with whom he worked and from whom for a year or more he had derived certain pleasures of companionship.'

r

Ross see Demelza with new eyes and has a raging desire for her,

Winston Graham wrote in the first edition of the first book that by the time of Elizabeth's visit Ross’s resentment of Elizabeth in her betrayal with marrying his cousin, was gone and so this was the case by the time he decided to marry Demelza. Obviously a lack of anger towards Elizabeth is a sign of eventual positive processing of the hurt she caused him, a finding of peace in the situation and as close as one can get to closure. That of course helped to enable Ross, just like it would for anyone else to move on with a more healthier frame of mind and for this to also enable a better chance of building something new with someone else. That reduced the risk level. So did Ross experiencing a 'raging desire' for Demelza as Winston wrote before he slept with her. That was an important factor. Ross marrying a woman who while not yet loving her, he at least was attracted to, did indeed reduced the risk in Demelza's acceptance of his proposal. 

'This was no blind seeking after sensation in order to drown a hurt, as it had been on the night of the ball. This was fair desire....Her skin smelt of something out of doors. Meadowsweet...And that old stiff silk dress, part of an older love.'

'Ross Poldark' First Edition Internal Book 2 Chapter 6  Part3 

Ross finds that he is still attracted to his new wife as she quickly 
grows into his life as his wife.

Graham narrated that unlike Ross's attempt to get over Elizabeth by sleeping with a prostitute (Margaret), that his interest in Demelza was not for that aim at all. He also wrote in the first edition of that first book that Ross thought Demelza was a ‘fair desire’ which spoke to a less transactional basis to their marital union in the manner that there is for one off sexual pleasure with a random woman. And of significance Ross and Demelza had a fair connection to add substance to their partnership. The concept of marriage to Ross was actually far from illogical because of the connection Ross and Demelza had built up by then. Graham had developed a narrative whereby, by that time and as covered in ‘Falling in Friendship’ Ross and Demelza did have a special bond. Demelza had become his best friend, which of course is a great foundation for a marriage. 

The Ross And Demelza Marriage- A Surprisingly Solid Foundation 

‘At its core, friendship is about being there for one another. This unwavering presence creates a sense of security that is vital in marriage. Knowing that your partner is also your best friend fosters a deep sense of trust and stability.’

8 reasons why friendship is the key to a healthy and lasting marriage 

By Franz Schubert

The special bond and friendship that Ross and Demelza had should not be underplayed when considering the risk of failure for their marriage. Their friendship was very likely the key to their success in marriage because it spoke to their compatibility. It was good for Demelza that her new husband to be appreciated her qualities and as revealed in the narration thought she was wife material and that 'she was a not unsuitable match for an impoverished farmer squire.' But friendship as they had is known to be a more solid foundation to aid the strength of a marriage so that it is more likely to be sustained over a lasting time. This can be more so than sexual attraction which can burnout over time. As said via various studies and surveys, couples that have a marriage founded on the principles of genuine friendship often have deeper connections which actually is often what helped to form their friendship in the first instance. Covered in '8 reasons why friendship is the key to a healthy and lasting marriage' the other qualities that friendship in a marriage inspires, include resilience to overcome challenges together. There is also patience and determination to rebuild where there have been such failings by one or both spouses. Of course this all lessened the risk of Ross and Demelza’s marriage failing. But of course Demelza could also rely on her own knowledge and observations of Ross's noble character and strong loyalties. In fact Graham narrated in 'Warleggan' that she relied on this as 'one of the virtues of his nature (which) would preserve him to herself in the last resort.' Demelza was probably right to feel this, except when he lost his reason during raging anger. Certainly a marriage to Ross carried less risk than one to a man like John Treneglos whose values were such that he made comments throughout the duration of the saga indicating he thought it normal for a man to get additional sexual pleasure in their marriages from women or young girls that were not necessarily their wives. 

A More High risk Marriage With Elizabeth 

"She's not really a very nice character so, although there was a
model for her, I'd prefer not to say who."
Winston Graham (Radio Times)

Ironically Winston Graham did not provide narrative that really pushed a strong friendship and connection between Ross and Elizabeth. There was lust disguised as love but as a friend Elizabeth failed Ross from the outset of the story and this was sustained without any amends. This went from her courting with Francis behind Ross's back while he was at war and having agreed to marry him, her harsh response to his upset about this where she made herself the victim and him the unfair one, her reappearance years later seeking his romantic attention only after her marriage deteriorated, her resumed pursuit of him to regain ascendancy over him when he was happily married, her deception over her George's courting of her and her pretence of loyalty to him before a marriage to George which gave him control of Ross's ancestral home. It appeared that it was Ross that demonstrated the qualities of true friendship to Elizabeth, with her quite lacking as a friend. Fitting with Winston Graham describing Elizabeth as a character that was not very nice, was Ross's eventual realisation that he had idealised her. Ross had clearly thought better of her than she really was and this would surely have been exposed in marriage and been problematic for it. Meanwhile it would also be fair to say that given their different characters and Ross's own self admission in ‘Jeremy Poldark’ that there were elements of Elizabeth character that would make marriage to Elizabeth more difficult, a marriage to Elizabeth for all the reasons set out above would have been much more high risk than one to Demelza whom he had more shared values with and stronger friendship with. The elements of Demelza's character were such that Ross once wondered in 'The Angry Tide' ‘………if there had ever been a couple who got less on each others nerves than they did.’ That was not the case with Elizabeth who irritated Ross on several occasion and often caused him to feel the need to bite his tongue in just casual conversation.

 

Love Trumps Risk: A Simple Falling for The Bachelor Boss

'She would be so filled with pride that everyone would know the truth without having to whisper and peer and pry.'

Demelza thinking about if the rumours in the village about her and Ross were true 'Ross Poldark'  Internal Book 2 Chapter 5 prt2

Demelza loved Ross before she was seventeen but never anticipated 
marriage to him.

If there is a reason for a woman to marry a man, then love should top the list and Graham wrote a reflection in the last book ‘Bella Poldark’ that 'Demelza had known long before she was seventeen whom she loved and would always love.' Of course, that was Ross. Yet in the 18th century, love was such a bonus. This was so that, in that case, one might never mind any particular risk associated with the marriage as long as they had this love for their future husband. So in a sense, as Demelza loved Ross, that alone meant that marriage to him was worth the risk that related to her situation. The truth is that true love can be spellbinding and while Demelza had kept her love to herself but still felt the idea of being torn away from Ross by her father to be excruciating, when matters led to the love of her life offering himself to her as a life partner as a husband, Demelza would hardly be thwarted by some red flags, This is even if she were aware of them. The heart wants what the heart wants if it truly wants it and even if the risks became something that did actually decimate it all, perhaps Demelza is likely to have followed the concept of it being better to have had the chance to have loved in a marriage and lost this, than not at all. Either way at the point off the marriage offer Demelza was probably too far gone with love and hope to reject the offer.   

A Lucky Not Daring Decision For Demelza

Ross described Demelza as his lover, companion, the keeper of his conscience and a
woman comparable to no other woman. (Bella Poldark)

So Demelza's love and the love that Ross grew to have for her did indeed show that risk in this marriage was worth taking. Further Demelza got the premium deal which doubled its worth when Ross loved her back in return just six weeks after marriage. Demelza’s agreement to marry Ross turned out to be more lucky than risky. Indeed this is despite his unfaithfulness with Elizabeth which inadvertently raised her value to him, lowered Elizabeth’s to him and exposed his desire for her as a sham. Ross also once told Demelza years later that he felt that meeting her was the luckiest thing that had happened to him. But for Demelza, apart from meeting Ross and becoming his maid, the luck started with her father being a trigger to all this and threatening to remove her from Nampara and therefore from the place and man that she loved. Thus in fear of this and with this also as a provocation, Demelza only sought to seduce and sleep with Ross so that he would have enough feeling for her to then be willing to fight for her to stay as his maid. And from that came so much more. After three years of working for Ross at Nampara, her simple goal with this mission lead to and an unexpected marriage offer which enabled her to remain there as Ross’s life partner in holy matrimony. But also Demelza was lucky to have gained so much more. At the most Demelza considered herself lucky that she might be 'Ross’s woman' but in the form of his mistress. She never thought as far as this gentleman squire making her his wife, mistress of Nampara, mother of his five children and recipient of both his and their love too. So Demelza's daring and risky decision was ultimately a massively lucky one. 

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Meeting Demelza - Short Story By Winston Graham

Ross and Elizabeth's Sham Childish Love! A Past and Mistaken Identity

Ross Poldark’s Fall Out Of Love With Elizabeth (Winston Graham's Notes Of Ross's Sham Desire)

Winston Graham's Thoughts on Poldark (Words from the Author)

Marrying Demelza: The 'Obvious' Way Out For Ross (Duty Or Desire)

Marry Demelza: The Engaging & Vital Character Pt1 (Foiling Elizabeth -Saving Ross)

10 Truths On Elizabeth's Astonishments and Humiliations Pt1 (Demelza-Bud on the Horizon)

Demelza- Elizabeth's Powerful Obstacle (Pt2 10 Truths On Elizabeth's Astonishments and Humiliations )

Elizabeth : Observing The New Prize Wife - Demelza Pt 3 (10 Truths On Elizabeth's Astonishments and Humiliations )

Elizabeth: Envy Of The New 'Great Lady' -Demelza Pt 4 (10 Truths On Elizabeth's Astonishments And Humiliations) 

Ross Poldark: Moving On From Elizabeth