Search This Blog

Elizabeth : Observing The New Prize Wife - Demelza Pt 3 (10 Truths On Elizabeth's Astonishments and Humiliations )

blog banner of Ross Poldark smiling at Demelza who side profile is smiling with her head down while Elizabeth is behind looking sad at their love

Humiliation: To reduce (someone) to a lower position in one's own eyes or others' eyes / to make (someone) ashamed or embarrassed.
As this post covers Demelza's formal introduction to the Trenwith Poldarks and their friends as Ross's wife in December 1787, this is the third one in the series of essays exploring the theme of astonishment and humiliation that Elizabeth once introduced as a cloud over her life. The last two posts in the series were 'Bud On The Horizon' and 'Demelza-Elizabeth's Powerful Obstacle'. They covered the first two scenes which seem to have contributed to this theme against Elizabeth. As set out in that first and lead post in this series, and in accordance with the definition, humiliation for Elizabeth's theme would involve narrative and story development that seemed to lower her position to the reader. For instance, through her position to Ross being knocked as the woman that was 'The prize' above most other women, including Demelza. Indeed as Demelza was an unexpected roaring success for this Christmas event Elizabeth had a front row seat in observing Demelza assert her position as as a 'prize' wife for Ross. This is just like how Elizabeth had previously been thought of as when marrying Francis. As if recognising her own reduced and lower position under Demelza just as if in her shadow, Elizabeth would have an emotional reaction to this. This would include an outburst and a plan to redress this which would reveal the extent of Elizabeth's displacement and bitterness. 


Third Scene: Piqued By The Success Of Ross's New Bride- Demelza

'At Christmas she had been piqued by the young Demelza's success, and today she had taken pains to see if she could rebuild her ascendancy over Ross, a matter that was becoming more important to her than it had once been.'


With Ross in December 1787, then married to Demelza and him taking her to meet his family at Trenwith for Christmas, Graham set the tone of there being a competitive element to this meeting between the Demelza and Elizabeth. For instance he fed this in beforehand in Demelza's reaction to the invitation which had come from Francis to Ross. Graham conveyed that Demelza was wary of this invitation and he wrote that she felt it was some sort of a trap that Elizabeth was behind. As Graham narrated, Demelza thought it was '...in order to examine her...to get Ross into an atmosphere where he would see what a mistake he had made in marrying a low-class girl, and humiliate her by a display of her fine manners.' The narrative of the two women being pitted against each other was furthered by Graham when writing that on seeing Elizabeth it occurred to Ross that he had not been as unemotional as he had expected. He considered that Demelza had not been the inoculation he thought she would be against the 'fever' he had for Elizabeth. Of course, Demelza would turn out to be this over time when after that night with Elizabeth in 'Warleggan' Ross failed to find what he had with Demelza in Elizabeth, which evidently is what he truly wanted. But until then, at this stage in the story his reaction to Elizabeth of still having an emotional stirring for her was realistic as it could hardly have been expected that his feeling for Elizabeth would disappear on first sight of her after marriage to Demelza, or even very soon after. 

Of course, if Ross had felt nothing for Elizabeth at this Christmas gathering then that would be the end of Graham's storyline which rested on Ross's eventual discovery that his real and true love was for Demelza and not the woman who had first initially rejected him, who he had pinned all his hopes on when fighting a war and who he had idealised. So Elizabeth was built up quite high as a character that was 'The Prize'. This was until she was slowly brought down over the course of the first four books of the saga and afterwards. Before then it was necessary to establish Elizabeth as a potential threat to the Ross and Demelza story line even if she was not in the end. But in many ways, as part of a hidden truth that Elizabeth was not such a threat after all, and that Demelza was the frontrunning underdog all along, Elizabeth as a threat was the essence of the narrative that was essentially to be undermined. This is even as early as this part of the story for this Trenwith Christmas event. Indeed, if there was a battle and an overall war it would be Demelza that won this battle, and in due course the war too! For now this Christmas event would demonstrate that the obstacle that Demelza had presented to Elizabeth during 'The Bluebell scene' six months beforehand, would prove to be a significant and ongoing obstacle. It was one that probably was underestimated by Elizabeth, the reader, or both.

A Failed Expectation Of Advantage 


'All things reviewed, it had been Demelza's evening. She had come through a searching test with quite remarkable sucess.' 

Demelza Poldark sits next to Elizabeth at Trenwith on Aunt Agatha's request and Ross gives them a side glance
Series fiction scene not in the Poldark novel but 
representative of Winston Graham's theme
of Demelza & Elizabeth pitted against each 
other.
As the character that was set up as 'The prize' and dream woman of Poldark, who was sought after by the main male characters, Ross, Francis and George, and admired by all for her physical beauty, Ross bringing his wife, a miner’s daughter, who was pretty but not beautiful, to meet Elizabeth for the first time, was supposed to be an ordeal which would undermine Demelza. Not Elizabeth! Essentially just as Demelza had thought, it was supposed to be an ordeal of comparison where Elizabeth had the advantage of looks, status and her history with Ross. Indeed, it was also supposed to be a literal and thematic battle of comparison between the two women as to who would fair better with this to Ross when put side by side. The recent 2015 series added a scene not in the books which was a depiction of this idea where Demelza is literally made to sit next to Elizabeth to compare her against and Ross is seen giving both women a side glance in assessment. But with Elizabeth set up so high in terms of her beauty and an emotional hold over Ross which had sent him into depression for years, Demelza's case was supposed to be hopeless. Seeing Demelza near Elizabeth was supposed to cause Ross to see how much more of a prize Elizabeth was. That was then to make him feel short changed by having Demelza as his wife instead. However, despite the reader being led to see Demelza as the underdog, after Ross's concerning thoughts that showed some ongoing feeling for Elizabeth, to use a key term of the theme, Graham took the narrative for this event down an 'astonishing' direction whereby the reverse happened. He presented Demelza as 'the prize'. This was not just for Ross but as the star of the night to all there too. 

Elizabeth Replaced On The Pedestal


'Natural that he should be pleased with her (Demelza); she had never looked so charming before. In her own queer way this evening she rivalled Elizabeth.....'
Ross thinking about Demelza  'Ross Poldark' ( Internal Book 3 Chapter 4) 

Indeed Demelza took the spotlight at this first family Christmas as Ross's wife and therefore she was elevated as a character and person in their circle since she had earned admiration and respect. Demelza had managed to win over Francis, Agatha, secured Verity's pride in her, attracted the romantic interest of John Treneglos and therefore also the bitchy jealousy of Ruth Teague which Demelza countered gracefully with polite but cutting jibes back at her. This narrative was alongside constant references to Ross's thoughts of his pleasure, pride and amusement of her as his new wife. When out of the room Graham wrote of Ross that 'The thoughts of Demelza warmed his mind and lit it up as the arrival of the candles had lit the room.' With John drooling over Demelza and Francis declaring to Ross "I like your wife. From Verity's account I thought I should. She walks like a mettlesome colt.", she was being presented as the new shiny prize. 

Demelza had exceeded Ross's expectation at this family introduction event and while he told her she had been a 'triumph' that night Graham also formally declared in his narration (heading the paragraph above) that Demelza's visit to Trenwith had indeed been a 'searching test'. In doing so Graham corroborated Demelza's thinking of what this visit was about and the significance of it. However, as if they were foretelling thoughts, Ross specifically thought that Demelza had rivalled Elizabeth. With this Graham was continuing the theme which he started in 'The bluebell scene' of Ross elevating Demelza as a woman who could then be compared against Elizabeth as earthenware versus porcelain. But this was in an increasingly competitive way since he had previously thought Elizabeth was not comparable to any or most other women. Now Ross's thoughts were more favourable in thinking Demelza was actually then in the same arena as her. Perhaps this was closers to porcelain if the perception for him was that this was of higher quality. 

The Affront From Elizabeth's Perspective


The mortifying situation for Elizabeth here was that six months beforehand she had made a rare visit out of desperation to Nampara for a romantic reconciliation with Ross only to be usurped and brought face to face with ‘the girl’ she had advised him to send back to her father and which he then seemed to be in a romantic relationship with. In the moment Ross seemed to choose Demelza or at least remained inclined to take up a new opportunity with her, rather than the opportunity of a dangerous liaison with Elizabeth. This was despite how he had previously revealed to her years before that he could be willing to do that at Francis's expense. Then to add to the affront, marriage bans were announced days after her visit that he would marry that very girl who was apparently so much less beautiful than her and so much lesser in status and class. Now ‘the girl’ who was much more lowly than her was at her grand home as Ross's new wife being embraced and received as a success by her husband, her in laws and her friends who Graham seemed to stage manage to be present in order to add to the numbers appreciating Demelza. 

It was all of the backstory Elizabeth had with Demelza and those numbers of people appreciating her that validated the pride and love Ross had for Demelza and undermined Elizabeth’s prejudice led disdain for her. This idea was conveyed in Graham's narrative that in John Treneglos spending time with Demelza and being impressed with seeing what she was like 'He was just beginning to realise why Ross had committed the solecism of marrying his kitchemaid.' Indeed, since Elizabeth would not have known that the love for Demelza from Ross actually came six weeks after marriage, by the time of this visit the way Ross and Demelza presented with each other would have appeared to prove to her that it had been a genuine love marriage from the start. 

Indeed Demelza being embraced in the way she was here, and in future scenes to be considered later, was like an  endorsement of her as being a worthy wife for Ross. Indeed Lord Falmouth once told Ross that explicitly. But more to the point of this post it will have dispelled any solace that Elizabeth could have taken if the common view was that this was not the case and if Demelza was thought of by her family and friends as a poor choice for Ross. The occurrence of Demelza being so well received rather than just tolerated and accepted would have been an astonishment as part of the theme to a woman like Elizabeth who should have been the frontrunner. Indeed, it is for this reason that even Ross had thought that when it came to beauty for instance, Elizabeth '...started any such competition with advantages of feature and colouring over all women.' But nevertheless his conclusion, as mentioned, was that Demelza had rivalled Elizabeth because ' ..some challenge born in the situation had brought out the best of Demelza's good look....' 

It was not just Demelza's looks that made her a competitive rival against Elizabeth at this event. Ross had been surprised by how Demelza had conducted herself that night with her wit, charm and sassiness. Graham wrote that Ross was proud of her developing character and thus with all this, from the outside looking in, it is clear to see how this humiliated and undermined Elizabeth's character and profile within the story so far. This was by reducing her to being put in the shade with even the reader then reading of complaints about her from her husband Francis as being a wife that "...makes life a mortal serious business." This was in contrast toDemelza who was presenting as an engaging and charming wife. But also Winston Graham would eventually share narrative that privately Elizabeth had indeed felt undermined by Demelza's success that night.

The Stings In The Tale For Elizabeth 


"That's understandable....it was meeting the family wasn't it? And she is a little gauche yet. She would perhaps expect to find antagonisms.'
Elizabeth explaining to Ross her thoughts on why Demelza may have been reluctant to come to Trenwith for Christmas

Elizabeth Expected (Hoped For) Demelza's Failure 


There were a number of extra stings in the tale for Elizabeth for this Christmas event and thus her humiliating interaction with the Ross and Demelza love story here. This is bearing in mind that it was not as if Elizabeth had been outshone by a woman as great as her high status friend the Honourable Mrs Maria Agar. As a woman who expected admiration Elizabeth in that case may have been humbled by her own awe of Maria to then concede such defeat to her gracefully and without feeling insultingly reduced. Instead Elizabeth was outshone by a miner's daughter who Elizabeth told Ross in the quote above might have been reluctant to come to Trenwith and meet all these well bred gentlefolk because she was 'gauche'. With this term meaning lacking social grace, tactless or boorish, this of course is an indication of Demelza through Elizabeth's eyes. Furthermore, Elizabeth's comment that Demelza might have 'expected' to find antagonism and hence not be appreciated due to her lacking the sophistication of the Poldarks and their friends, was perhaps suggestive of Elizabeth's own views and predictions of how Demelza would have fared in this official introduction to the family. 

Of significance Elizabeth's comment suggests that she was not expecting Demelza to be that well received. That it was 'understandable' to think that Demelza might stand out negatively and that Elizabeth’s in laws and friends might not just be privately critical of Demelza but openly brash and irritated with her. Perhaps like Ruth Teague was. The fact that Elizabeth was wrong and Demelza ended up being embraced and celebrated as she took the spotlight that night, was another private egg on face experience for Elizabeth. It adds to the astonishment and the humiliation narrative, if only with the idea that Elizabeth's outlook and prediction was essentially mocked by this turn of events being the reverse of what she thought and most likely what she secretly hoped. Indeed it would be fair to says she hoped for Demelza's failure based on further comments she made and feelings she thought later on, (as set out below). Instead Demelza's exaltation by this story development brought Elizabeth not understandably (in her mind), but unexpectedly down to being overshadowed by such a lowly competitor. 

Erasure: A Flawless Replacement Of A Flawed Relationship


Competition? So where the discerning reader would recognise that there were initially hints of Elizabeth presenting as a potential threat to the Ross and Demelza love story, they could then grasp that by the end of the visit this idea was almost ridiculed and practically done away with. One might have thought that the ordeal of comparison and Ross seeing Elizabeth, the supposed 'prize', would have sowed some seeds of discontent in Ross for what he was missing. However along with the theme of Elizabeth sometimes bolstering up the Ross and Demelza love story it was almost as if the visit served to strengthen and reinforce Ross's choice of Demelza as a solid true and real love. That is the extra sting here. For instance, despite a whole evening with his first love Graham wrote that by the end of the night, in respect of Ross and Demelza, that 'Their relationship at that moment had no flaw.' That is suggestive of Ross still being totally into and committed to Demelza, because if he had had the wondering eye it would indeed have been a flawed relationship at that time. 

The irony and that sting of Ross's then flawless relationship with Demelza supports the theme that is central to this essay. This is as the reader might not have expected that an encounter with Elizabeth would end up going so far in Demelza's favour. Furthermore the reference to his relationship with Demelza having no flaw contrasts unfavourably for Elizabeth against the comparison of the very flawed relationship history he had had with her by that point. It serves to again put Elizabeth down as if the story themes and messages were designed to take a jab at her. From this strongly pro Demelza narrative, whether they did or did not, readers were given the information to have a stronger belief in the resilience and destiny of the pairing of Ross and Demelza irrespective of Elizabeth hoovering in the shadows and to have more faith in the truth of Verity's words to Demelza that she was a solid replacement for Elizabeth. This was when she stayed at Nampara and in observing Ross's love of Demelza three months after they married. At that time Verity had said to Demelza about it "I have seen it's no makeshift at all. It is real..I don't know how you've done it ....He has lost the biggest thing in his life - and found it again in another person." 

Replaced By Something Greater-A First Love Of Lessening Consequence


'After a whole seven hours in Elizabeth's company he still wanted me at the end. After a talk all to themselves with her making eyes at him like a she-cat, he still came to me.' 
Narrative of Demelza's astonishing observation 

This Christmas family event at Trenwith did not just suggest that Elizabeth had been replaced by Demelza, it suggested that Elizabeth had been outdone by her. This seemed so as the narratives in the final scenes of Ross and Demelza walking home showed so.  If Demelza had faced a test with the visit, then in some ways Ross had too! Demelza had observed that he had spent some significant time with Elizabeth where she (Elizabeth) was making eyes at him and this could have caused Ross to fall back into an active enchantment of her and to be derailed away from his love and happiness with her (Demelza). But Demelza saw Ross still desired her (Demelza), and so readers should note that despite exposure to his first love, Elizabeth had little effect on him to negatively impact his feelings for Demelza and lessen them in favour of her. Therefore in this story development Elizabeth was presented as losing her power over Ross as if she was of no or at least much less consequence to Ross than readers might have thought in this first test. This is something readers would come to read that Elizabeth had become aware of herself!

Leaving Trenwith, instead of Ross being confused he was elated and reminded of how happy he was with Demelza. This is narrated as being in a 'new and less ephemeral way than before'. This suggests that Ross knew this happiness was to have more permanence than what he had with Elizabeth and is another jab undermining Elizabeth by highlighting unfavourable comparisons. Feeling a queer sense of enlightenment, Ross in the first edition text of the first book thanks God for his wife and thinks that it if he could choose to be frozen in time, then it was then, and to be with Demelza. This being just after spending time with his first love is incredibly significant. Another very meaningful narrative in Winston Graham's words here is that for Ross 'It seemed to him that all his life had moved to this pinpoint of time down the scattered threads of twenty years...' With the the only reference in Ross's thoughts to Elizabeth here, it went on that this was from his childhood to Elizabeth's choice of Francis and '..from the simple philosophies of Demelza's own faith, all had been animated to a common end - and that end a moment of enlightenment and understanding and completion.' 

Essentially without a suggestion of a longing and desire for Elizabeth the encounter at Trenwith had led Ross to feel that he was meant to be with Demelza, that it was his destiny and this was what he wanted to hold on to. With sardonic irony Elizabeth’s interaction with their love story development had indeed bolstered it by bringing Ross to feel so strongly that Demelza was the one and laying a good foundation against whatever threat she might come to present later on. With Ross’s strength of feeling, so much the other way from a view that he was always yearning for Elizabeth, this is quite the ‘astonishing’ outcome. It does appear that in those final scenes, and certainly if that had been the first and only book, then the lasting impression would be that Elizabeth was minimised post Christmas family party, and then almost made into a non issue for that time in the story. Certainly, in those final scenes, as they will have turned their back on Elizabeth and Trenwith and trundled off home treasuring what they had in each other, even within Demelza who typically would always be on guard about Elizabeth and her intentions, there was the erasure of Elizabeth as a potential threat to her. Demelza had arrived feeling insecure about Elizabeth’s influence in Ross but left feeling less so. Winston Graham purposefully and meaningfully had the final scene of them play out with Demelza singing a song about an old couple as if this was foretelling of their future ongoing togetherness. Indeed that would play out right to the twelfth book and the short stories thereafter!

Sympathy Of Elizabeth From The Miner's Daughter 


"Perhaps I feel sorry for her (Elizabeth). Why does Francis look so bored? Perhaps I feel sorry for her after all."
Demelza thinking about Elizabeth 

But there is a further element of humiliation that the reader could pick up on, on Elizabeth's behalf. Without the intention, it was at Elizabeth's expense that Demelza was feeling triumphant that Ross did not fold as Elizabeth made eye at him. As well as denoting what could be considered as Elizabeth's embarrassing failure to usurp Demelza in Ross's mind, Graham struck a double blow by narrating Demelza's thoughts of feeling sorry for Elizabeth. Demelza felt this sympathy after thinking of Elizabeth's failed eyeing up of Ross and then observing that unlike her, Elizabeth did not have a husband who was as stimulated and enamoured with her as Ross was with her (Demelza). Elizabeth's pride (to be revealed later in the narrative) in thinking herself above Demelza as a greater lady might probably have meant that this sympathy would be disconcerting to Elizabeth. Of course it should not typically be that the minder's daughter should feel sorry for the gentle lday as that in a way is a looking down on her or some element of patronising. Whatever the case the reader might appreciate after this event the concept of  'how the mighty have fallen' applies in this reversal of standing between the two women. It can reasonably feel like Graham showed a commitment to this astonishment and humiliation theme in closing the first book by elevating Demelza not just with regards to confirming her ascendancy over Ross instead of Elizabeth, but also having Demelza look sympathetically down on Elizabeth as a pitiable figure. That is in terms of her marital circumstance compared and her failed attempt to be effectively alluring to another man (Ross).  

Elizabeth's Reaction


A Tongue Lashing For Demelza


"Perhaps his little wife would not welcome new servants lest she should be mistaken for one of them."

"That is what people will be saying of us if Demelza tries to play the great lady before she has even learned to play the small one."
Elizabeth vents at Francis when he compliments Demelza  'Demelza'  first edition (Internal Book 1 Chpt 6)

Winston Graham did not give readers an insight into Elizabeth's feelings on Demelza's Christmas success in the moment or soon after. It was covered primarily in the first edition of the second book. An argument that she had with Francis in the sixth chapter of the first edition is very revealing for understanding. As Francis praised Demelza and even suggested that Demelza's lower status did not preclude her from being accepted into society, Elizabeth angrily suggested that Demelza could be an embarrassment to their family with their friends if she tried to come across as a great lady before she had learnt to play the small one. She also made jibes at the idea of Demelza being mistaken for a servant and snapped to Francis "...keep your thanks for....and your praise for the beggar girl Ross has married!" 

Apart from these unearthed inner thoughts of Elizabeth being mean-spirited it is confirmatory that what might have looked like her polite observation when she had previously called Demelza 'gauche' to Ross, was actually the exposure of the spiteful judgment of prejudice that before then she had privately held against Demelza and that she hoped other people would share too. Clearly Elizabeth had hoped Demelza did not blossom out of the gaucheness Elizabeth felt she observed of her, as that would ensure Demelza remained in the category of the much smaller lady. But speaking of behaviour to be disapproved of if the theme of astonishment and humiliation was maintained against Elizabeth because she was not truly a nice character, then this was one of the moments where this could be seen. Elizabeth's ill will and prejudice towards Demelza could be viewed as such and if Winston Graham considered this too, then as a corrective that may then have rendered Elizabeth one again subject to a story development which did then, and would continue to undermine her. 

From Low- A Quest To Reclaim A Higher Position To Ross


Elizabeth's comments about Demelza provides context and shows that she wanted Demelza to play a lower position than Elizabeth had seen her play. Naturally that means that Elizabeth had observed Demelza playing at that higher level than her and that this was the source of the humiliation narrative. To verify that, as extracted at the top of this essay Graham revealed in that second book that Elizabeth had been 'piqued' by Demelza’s success at the Christmas family event six months before. With this word meaning annoyed, irritated or resentful, this really does supports the astonishment and humiliation feeling that the theme implies Elizabeth felt. But as well as this Elizabeth's response to engage in behaviour with a motive to 'regain' ascendancy over Ross is another confirmation  and admission that she thought she had lost this ascendancy of Ross to Demelza. Therefore as suggested above Elizabeth felt herself that she had essential been knocked off Ross's mental pedestal with Demelza positioned there instead. That then does fits with the idea of Elizabeth feeling debased in line with feeling humiliated and therefore wanting Demelza to ‘come down’ and play a smaller lady. 

Of course it may have been reasonable for Elizabeth to have felt a little hurt and astonished that the man who once presented as being so in love with her, had finally after four years found someone else who in her mind was so much less and yet seemed to be in love with instead of her. It may have knocked her self esteem. However the element of Elizabeth's behaviour to be disapproved of is that she did not stop there and leave as thought and self wallowing. Instead in her own way she was narrated to have 'taken pains' with actions designed however subtly to 'rebuild' her ascendancy over Ross. If successful then the likely harm that this could have caused to Ross and Demelza’s marriage (as this behaviour could to any marriage),  is obvious. However even if this was not successful (as it ultimately was not), then still, just Elizabeth’s self serving intention and the pains taken by her are enough for ‘justified disapproval’ which  warranted Winston Graham's corrective narrative. This was in accordance with the theme against her of not only of astonishments and humiliations but in the narrative and theme that ran  alongside this of Elizabeth's ongoing failures. 

Having seen Demelza be embraced and admired by her family and friends, as if she were a ‘prize lady’ and 'prize wife' for Ross, the next post will see Elizabeth in the shadows once again. This time Elizabeth would observe Demelza winning over grand society as if she were belle of the ball and as if she was the new 'great' lady on the scene that Elizabeth said Demelza should not play. 

Labels: , , ,

Previous posts